Oh, But You're Patient.
That's what I hear a lot when I talk about how teaching children at home is a very doable choice. Truth: I am no more patient than they. I get frustrated and so do my kids. We have our 'bad' days but most of them are good. Even the 'bad' days aren't really so bad afterall.
I Would Kill Her If I Had To Spend That Much Time With Her. Yikes! You would be amazed at how many times I've heard this one from mothers. Yes - they are speaking about their own daughters. Truth: I have never felt the need to kill my children. In fact, the more time I spend with them the more I appreciate and enjoy them.
She Won't Listen To Me. Truth: Sometimes my kids don't listen to me until I holler at them or take a privilege away. I know my kids (as a result of spending time with them) and do my best to respond to their needs as students. You can't believe how much they respond to that. Kids are curious. Kids want to know how things work. Your kids will be amazed at how much you know. Kids will follow your lead when it comes to learning something together.
I Am A Terrible Speller. Truth: Okay, okay. Spelling was one of my best subjects. I am still a stickler for spelling and grammar. Here's the deal though - - a list of correctly spelled spelling words is provided. The kid studies it and practices with the words and does puzzles and games and sentences with the correctly spelled words. Then when the spelling test comes - the parent has the list of correctly spelled words to refer to when checking the child's work!
I Am Not A Teacher. Truth: Actually - you are a teacher. You are a parent and teach your children every single day whether you realize it or not. Not only that, you want the absolute best for your child and are the one person in the world who most wants to see your child succeed and be happy and whole. You care more than anyone else.
What About Math??!! (said with a horrified look on the face) Truth: I am not a mathemetician yet my kids test 2 to 3 grade levels above their peers in math. For example, I never understood the fractions 100% when I came up through school. I do now, since I have had to teach it to my child. It's all right there in the book. Everything you have ever forgotten is right there in the math textbook.
Some Parents Help Their Kids Cheat. Truth: No way. No how. Not any of the homeschoolers I know. Take the fractions thing for example. I could have done like they did me in school - think it is okay that I only understood 3/4 (<== lol! get it? It's a fraction!) of the material for fractions and move on. My kids understand it 100% before we move on. Even if it means taking a couple of extra days and trying some different ways of presenting the information. What good does it do for a kid to not know the material? It does them no good at all. Besides. Cheating is not the American Way! And also besides: Kids want to know.
You Can't Deny That Academically Home Educated Children Are Better Off - But What About Socialization? Truth: It now cannot be denied that home educated children are better off in their socialization as well. There have been too many studies done that prove my point. There have been studies done on the studies. Children need adults to teach them how to act in the world, not a pack of clueless kids to teach them how to act in the world.
TRUST YOURSELF! There is also tons of help out there for anything, and I mean anything, that you are feeling unsure about. We have so many options!
I Would Kill Her If I Had To Spend That Much Time With Her. Yikes! You would be amazed at how many times I've heard this one from mothers. Yes - they are speaking about their own daughters. Truth: I have never felt the need to kill my children. In fact, the more time I spend with them the more I appreciate and enjoy them.
She Won't Listen To Me. Truth: Sometimes my kids don't listen to me until I holler at them or take a privilege away. I know my kids (as a result of spending time with them) and do my best to respond to their needs as students. You can't believe how much they respond to that. Kids are curious. Kids want to know how things work. Your kids will be amazed at how much you know. Kids will follow your lead when it comes to learning something together.
I Am A Terrible Speller. Truth: Okay, okay. Spelling was one of my best subjects. I am still a stickler for spelling and grammar. Here's the deal though - - a list of correctly spelled spelling words is provided. The kid studies it and practices with the words and does puzzles and games and sentences with the correctly spelled words. Then when the spelling test comes - the parent has the list of correctly spelled words to refer to when checking the child's work!
I Am Not A Teacher. Truth: Actually - you are a teacher. You are a parent and teach your children every single day whether you realize it or not. Not only that, you want the absolute best for your child and are the one person in the world who most wants to see your child succeed and be happy and whole. You care more than anyone else.
What About Math??!! (said with a horrified look on the face) Truth: I am not a mathemetician yet my kids test 2 to 3 grade levels above their peers in math. For example, I never understood the fractions 100% when I came up through school. I do now, since I have had to teach it to my child. It's all right there in the book. Everything you have ever forgotten is right there in the math textbook.
Some Parents Help Their Kids Cheat. Truth: No way. No how. Not any of the homeschoolers I know. Take the fractions thing for example. I could have done like they did me in school - think it is okay that I only understood 3/4 (<== lol! get it? It's a fraction!) of the material for fractions and move on. My kids understand it 100% before we move on. Even if it means taking a couple of extra days and trying some different ways of presenting the information. What good does it do for a kid to not know the material? It does them no good at all. Besides. Cheating is not the American Way! And also besides: Kids want to know.
You Can't Deny That Academically Home Educated Children Are Better Off - But What About Socialization? Truth: It now cannot be denied that home educated children are better off in their socialization as well. There have been too many studies done that prove my point. There have been studies done on the studies. Children need adults to teach them how to act in the world, not a pack of clueless kids to teach them how to act in the world.
TRUST YOURSELF! There is also tons of help out there for anything, and I mean anything, that you are feeling unsure about. We have so many options!
posted by Grizzly Mama | 00:15
15 Comments:
FANTASTIC post, Monica!!!
I hear the same statements, ALL the time!!
WHY do people have kids, if they don't enjoy spending time with them?
Socialization? Z's socialization in school was being bullied by BOTH kids and some teachers.
Our son does all the normal teen things. However, he relates well with and respects most adults! Show me a public school kid who can carry on an adult conversation with a roomful of adults.
Monica,
What a great summary of the benefits of homeschooling.
Monica,
Check your email.
Thank you tshsmom. I hear them so much too - especially the one about a parent not being able to stand being around their own children. I can't relate to that at all. Some people don't like their kids at all and some actually seem to hate their kids. It's too bad because the kids I know are perfectly nice. The socialization objection is total crap - - but it was the last hurdle I had to get over myself, before making the decision to do it. Once I looked into it, saw the studies and spoke with other homeschooling parents then I realized it was crap. People who don't know me or my kids very well really think that my kids are 'isolated'. lol! Sending your kid to the school every day doesn't equate to socializing - yet many parents feel that is adequate. It's not. I have noticed a difference with every single homeschooled kid that I have met - they are much more comfortable carrying on conversations with everyone at a gathering no matter the age. The difference is marked especially with the teenagers - kids who are publics seem very closed off and extremely uncomfortable outside the circle of that few kids they call friends that are their own age.
Thank you Skye - I am checking my email ASAP.
Monica - THIS ROCKS! YOU ROCK! Not only have you hopefully informed and encouraged anyone who is curious about homeschooling, but some of us who homeschool too!
And yes, the best part of educating them is being able to move at THEIR pace. If they are zooming, there's no one to wait for. If they don't get something, then you can take as much time as you want until they get it - master it - and move on. Can't really do that in classroom. You have articulated in very simple terms of how anyone can do it.\
And, tshsmom, you are so right too! I have been getting comments from some friends and neighbors on how well my son can interact with adults and yadda yadda yadda (good stuff) and wow, that makes it all worth it, ya know?!
Thank you Kate! There is a particular family member of mine - a teacher in public school - who keeps insisting that my kids aren't 'socialized'. In the same breath she will say how wonderfully behaved they are and how much fun it is to spend time with them.
O/T:
Monica,
I responded to your email. Hope you guys can attend!
Got it and replied Skye - thanks, girl!
I think there are advantages and disadvantages to homeschooling, private school and public. But if I hear one more person criticize homeschooling because of lack of socialization I'm going to scream. My kids are plenty social and have better quality friendships than I did at their ages.
All so true. Well done!
It's the last thing they have to grasp onto LMC - the socialization thing. It matters not that every study done proves them wrong. I agree that my kids are far more social than I was as a kid and much more involved in activities than any public (or private) kids on the block.
Thank you Suzanne - and thanks for visiting and commenting.
Angry Dan - you can't read very well, can you?
This part here: become adult children who can't look real adults in the eye
Sounds more like the public school kids that I know. Most definitely not the homeschoolers.
Monica: I come you get the mild version of "Angry Dan" and I get "Crazy Dan?"
P.S. Full Moon Moonbat Alert all this week.
Thanks for the warning Mike. I have taken to calling him Illiterate Dan. He can't frikkin read.
There he goes again. Time to say bye-bye Illiterate Dan!
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